Gone, but NEVER forgotten!
- Neshea Jade'
- Jan 20, 2022
- 2 min read
Yep, today is my birthday. I turned 40 today at 3am. Last night,my honey and I hung out watching classic movies with one of our favorite drinks to bring in a day of celebration.
I woke up feeling like nothing could stop me. Messages from friend and family and my sister sang to me. Then it hit me like a tin of bricks that my father isn’t here to sons to me anymore.
On my birthday, no matter where he was, my Pa Pa 🐻 always sang happy birthday to me. Yeah, I know it’s just a song everyone sings every birthday. But to me, no one and I mean no one, compares to my father’s voice and feelings.
I instantly began to cry and feeling down. But then I had to remember who my father was and who he still is to me and so many others. I know he doesn’t want me to be sad and crying all the time because I miss him so much. So, I search for his voice.
A bunny and her papa bear
I remember the last time, right before he went back into the VA, my son needed me to sit with him while he took a break and got some rest. If anyone knows my dad then you know that he is always been a happy and joyful person. What made him most happy is to see others full of joy.
In a recording of one of the last conversations I had with my dad, he is making fun of the attendant that had on cologne that was really loud to the senses. He always had a weak stomach but while in the hospital is it gotten worse. Whatever cologne the attending head on through my dad senses for a loop and of course he started making jokes like he always does, did. I hope you guys can get a laugh it feels much joy as I do right now just curious voice I miss you and love you so much Daddy, happy-birthday to me. 
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